Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Randomize
