she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
