from now on my penis is your penis
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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