We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
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Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
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He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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