If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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