i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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