How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
