The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
pop tarts are not kleenex
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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