It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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