Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
nutella sex= disaster
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize