People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Randomize