I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
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