he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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