i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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