8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize