just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
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