Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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