They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
