I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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