no. you can't hotbox the world.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
