Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
you didnt know i had herpes?
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize