Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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