I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
