Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
