But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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