I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Terrible idea I love it
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
