Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
i think im in europe. pls send help
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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