Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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