My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
