Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize