Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
It's never too late to be topless.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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