Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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