do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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