Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
It's official drugs can't kill me
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
