My first STD was from a foam party
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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