4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
