Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
If its not for food we ain't going out.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize