D3 body, D1 cock
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
