Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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