I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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