How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Randomize
