I bet he comes in French.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
