I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I'm too high and old for this...
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize