I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
