Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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