And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Randomize
