I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Randomize
