no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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