Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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