Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
